Enemy of the Public

Maybe you can, or maybe you can't, infer where the title of this post came from... just to make sure we're all on the same page; it is from the movie Public Enemy. I just saw it with my good friend Brendyn. First and foremost let me say that it was amazing! I absolutely LOVED it!

If you are SUPER anal about not giving ANYTHING away about a movie you might want to just skip to the end to read the summary of the blog post (last sentence).

My favorite part of the movie was the love story between John Dillinger and Billie Frechette. John is madly in love with Billie! I, being the hopeless romantic that I am, was captivated and transported to a realm of such devoted, undying, irresistible, unconditional love. It was fan-freaking-tastic!

I felt the bond was SO strong that I actually teared up and had a tear fall down my face. Now if you know me, you'll know that I just don't ever cry*... especially when it comes to movies. It made me long for that kind of relationship!

Not the one where it's just me that into the relationship, or just him that into the relationship, but one where we both are in love to the point of doing anything for each other. It's an easy thing to want in my mind. I mean really; who wouldn't want to always have someone to run to for whatever reason and know they will always be there no matter what?! That's what I hope to have one day!

Johnny Depp was SO great at portraying this chemistry. I know you're probably thinking, "uhh duh Karen, he's an actor he gets paid to make you believe he's in love with people all the time." BUT just because it's their profession, doesn't mean they do it seamlessly. His eyes said it all! If you watch the movie on mute and just look at the way Depp's eyes/face/body language are when he's with her you would get the same impression as you would with the sound on! Now THAT my friends is the hardest thing to do. For instance, Twilight has been deemed a great love story. The movie though didn't do the intense level of love between Bella and Edward justice. Those actors were definitely not as seasoned as Johnny.

AT ANY RATE, point being I love love, I want a connection and kinship one day that is enduring and never ending, and I appreciate actors who bring out the best of the love story!

Hopeless Romance

Today I was going through the stuff in my closet and I cam a cross a box full of a ton of mementos from when my dad was courting my mom. As I was looking through everything I started getting giddy and I was like a little school girl! I enjoyed it quite thoroughly.

I remember going through this box years ago and ever since then I've remembered a poem that my dad wrote for my mom. I found it again tonight. I'm going to share it now, because I figured I might as well... it's cute!

"It's written in pen, It started with a Kiss...
If you love me, honey, you answer just this!!!

Donna, I love you, So please be true.
Can't you tell by the things I do??

Your heart is like a lump of gold...
It's hard to get and hard to hold!!!

I once had a heart so warm and true,
But now it's gone from me to you!!!

Did you know that the Lord Above
Created you for me to love???

He picked you out from all the rest
Because he knew I'd like you best!!!

When I get to Heaven and see you're not there
I'll write your name on the Golden Stair

For all the angels to know how how much your love really means.

And if you're not there by the judgment day.
I'll know you went the other way!!!

I'll give the angels back their wings
Golden halos and all those things

And Just to prove my love is true
I'll go to hell to be with you."

-Jack Vizzard

I'll speak with you

I have recently met a very nice swing dancer from Australia. Being that he is from Australia it means he has a different accent and different mannerisms than what I'm used to when it comes to everyday speech. And I, being the observant person that I am, have noticed quite a few of them. For instance it's a car park... not a parking lot.

The one that really has stuck out though is whenever he talks about calling me or me calling him he always says "I'll speak with you..." Usually that wouldn't give anyone pause, but as we all know I'm a very unique individual. On the way home from dropping him off after dancing at Atomic I realized why I kept thinking about it!

I have always said/heard "I'll talk to you..." This is a one direction statement. It is the same as a note from high school, you write "TO:" and "From:" because in a note the person can't immediately reply to the person the note is from in the same form of the language. OR when you give a birthday present TO a person.

One of the dictionary definitions (the one that I felt applied best) of "to" is: "used as a function word to indicate movement or an action or condition suggestive of movement toward a place, person, or thing reached"

One of the dictionary definitions (the one that I felt applied best) of "with" is: "used as a function word to indicate combination, accompaniment, presence, or addition"

Keeping that in mind think about the statement, "I'll speak with you." I'm now being included. Isn't that one of the greatest human desires to be included?! When it was said to me it made me feel that I and what I had to say was just as important to him as himself or what he has to say. It is something that I haven't felt from a lot of people in my life.

I am just really impressed that a single word could technically change the meaning of a sentence to make it more respectful, more inclusive, and more friendly. I am even more impressed that people actually have another person's feelings (whether consciously or unconscious) in mind while saying something so simple as "I'll speak with you."

The Secret to Happiness

The other day I went over to my grandmother's house to drop off money and to check on her, you know, make sure everything is going alright. As we were talking she said to me "you're a lot happier now than you were when you first moved back from Utah."

This caused me to stop and think. I had a ton of thoughts/questions running through my mind. First, am I really happier, or is it just her perception? How can she tell that I'm happier? Why am I happier? How do I continue to be happy? How can I make myself even happier than I already am?!

I had to cut my visit with my grandma short because I had to get to work. The whole night at work I was racking my brain trying to answer all of these questions. I had a couple epiphanies!

First I realized I truly was happier. Dare I say the happiest I've been in my life (maybe just a very long time, but it feels like life). I don't know how my grandma was able to tell, but I'd like to think that it was because I was smiling from ear to ear.

Now we get down to the really important answers that I have yet to fully answer. Why am I happier? Well there are a few possibilities. So far I've attributed it mainly to dancing. I am not saying dancing wasn't awesome in Utah, but now I get to do it almost everyday and more opportunities are opening to me. Also because of dancing I am meeting amazing people that are helping me realize so many different things in many different facets of my life.

I also attribute my happiness to the sunshine. I have more time out in the sun here than I did when I was in Utah. I absolutely love it! It makes me happy (and tan, that's just an added bonus).

My conclusion? If you want to be extremely happy you should dance! I mean it seems to be the cure all for me!

Resolution Update

> Get a Passport and go out of the country
> Read at least one book a month
> Eat Better
> Do a full body cleanse at least twice this year
> Exercise more regularly
> Save money
> Travel somewhere I haven't been in the United States
> Dance every chance I get
> Do well in school
> Grow my hair long
> Make more of an effort to be close to my immediate and extended family

Above is the list of New Year's Resolutions I have made. So far I feel I have been successful in a few areas.

> I have not yet bought a passport. I keep saying I'll do it tomorrow.. Trust me tomorrow will come.
>I have kept up on my reading... just barely though! I'm gonna work harder on that one!
>I have started to eat more fruits and vegetables which is awesome (I had cut out sodas, but I fell off the wagon and now I'm gonna start again).
>I have not done a full body cleanse... to tell you the truth I am kind of scared to after reading about them... so I may or may not do that one!
>I have started going dancing a lot more... which doesn't really count as exercise in my book, but it's better than sitting around all day. I am going to start frequenting the gym more often though.
>I saved some money since this was written. Definitely not enough, but I can do a better job at that too!
>I will be traveling to Minneapolis May 1st to the 3rd! Woohoo for being able to completely check one off!
>I have been dancing every chance I get it is awesome how much more I appreciate dance as an art form and as a hobby!
>I haven't been really good about going to class... and I keep saying to myself that I'm gonna do better, but I keep forgetting. So now I have to get my butt in gear!
>HA! my hair is still WAY short!! but that's because of all of the stuff I've done to it!
>Being close to my family is still a work in progress!

Incompleteness in Absence

I have recently started doing what most people around my age do. Try to find out "who they are." I know a few things about myself, that I have always known, and I've discovered new things that I hadn't really realized before!

One of the things that I realized is how I know I feel love or compassion toward one person. And the following quote describes it. This quote has been on my facebook profile page ever since I signed up for the blasted social networking site. The reason it ended up on there was because I didn't have any quotes to put in my favorite quotes section.

Now you may be thinking well that doesn't make much sense... if you didn't have any quotes how did you get this one? Well my friend the answer consists of 6 letters... GOOGLE! yes I googled Love quotes. This along wih many other came up. I chose a few of the most romantic ones and posted them to my facebook page.

There's the story, but let's get to the meat of this blog post. The quote and what actually going back and reading it has done for me!

Today I begin to understand what love must be, if it exists. When we are parted, we each feel the lack of the other half of ourselves. We are incomplete like a book in two volumes of which the first has been lost. That is what I imagine love to be: incompleteness in absence.
-Edmond and Jules de Goncourt

I knew i felt love for people. The question now was how did I know I love people or how can i describe what it is to love someone. I feel this quote did a magnificent job of doing just that!

When I was in love the first time when I was with him I felt that we were two halves of a whole, peas in a pod, those heat friendship medallions fused together... I could go on and on. When that love was lost I felt like incomplete. I felt that a huge part of the puzzle had been taken away.

As a result of that heart break I am kind of scared to admit that I could possibly be falling for someone again. This is what I have been dealing with recently. Nothing different from anyone else. It's just prevalent in my thinking recently, as you can tell.

I was talking to a very dear friend of mine tonight, he helped me realize a few things that I've always believed, but haven't been practicing. One of my favorite Marilyn Monroe quotes says "... If you can't handle me at my worst then you don't deserve me at my best..." The same can be said in any type of relationship. If you aren't willing to wait out and work through the bad in a relationship you don't deserve the best that the relationship could be.

I feel this post is kind of all over the place and that maybe I should stop while I'm ahead, if I am even still ahead. The problem is the wheels in my head are still turning. I'm "thinking... a dangerous past time... I know" (whoever can name the movie gets extra points).

Hopefully I will be able to stop the wheels long enough to get some shut eye.

Dancing Bio

I was sooo excited about this that I just had to post it! Thanks to Morgan Day's creative writing he made what I wrote even better! Here is the final product!

Up-and-coming dancer, Karen Vizzard, first became enamored with Lindy Hop in 2003, when she was introduced to the dance at a Big Bad Voodoo Daddy concert in Santa Monica. Since then, she has dedicated herself to become an exceptional follow, as well as a versatile dancer with experience in Balboa, Collegiate Shag, and Solo and Partnered Charleston. Her competition experience includes, placing 1st in Utah’s 2007 Invitation Lindy Hop Jack & Jill, 2nd Place in the Pure Balboa Division at the 2008 San Francisco Balboa Battle, and 4th place in the Collegiate Shag Division at The National Jitterbug Championship in 2009. While attending school in Utah, Karen was a Lindy Hop instructor at Utah State and the University of Utah, and coached the Swing Team at Brigham Young University. Her other credits include performing with the Hollywood Hotshots, as well as being cast as a dancer in Katy Perry's music video "Thinking of You" and being cast as a principal dancer for the episode “Static” on the TV show “Cold Case.”